


Put That Thing Back Where It Came From

by Zillyhoo



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Kittens, tanaka is like the kitten whisperer
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-01
Updated: 2015-02-01
Packaged: 2018-03-10 00:02:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 569
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3269213
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zillyhoo/pseuds/Zillyhoo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Suga laments over his kitten's lack of interest in him, Tanaka is a glorified scratching post, and Daichi just wants new bed sheets.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Put That Thing Back Where It Came From

"I don't understand what I'm doing wrong. I looked up kitten care before I got her, I read articles about it, I give her really nice cat food, I have bonding time with her, so why won't she love me?!"

"Well for one, you saddled her with the name Kettle. I'd probably have an aversion to you too, if I were her."

Suga spins around in his computer chair to face Daichi, his lips pulled into a pout. Daichi raises his hands up in surrender, but a loud yelp from Tanaka diverts their attention away from each other.

"Ow, ow! My leg is not a scratch post, you dingaling!"

"...Dingaling?" Daichi gives Tanaka a skeptical look.

"She's just a kitten. We're trying not to say any bad words around her. We don't want to expose her to anything that will harm her emotionally," Suga elaborates.

"...Harm her emotional-... She's a cat!" Daichi throws his hands out in frustration.

"A _baby_ cat," Tanaka clarifies. There are scratches all over his body, in various stages of healing, and Tanaka couldn't be prouder.

Daichi suspects that not all of those scratches are Kettle's doing, but he doesn't want to open the door to his roommate's sex lives, so he turns the other way.

"All I know is the agreement was that the cat would stay if she didn't eat up our deposit on the apartment."

"And she hasn't! She only peed on the floor-... well-... and can you blame her for scratching up the drapes? They're just asking for it." Suga narrows his eyes at the curtains, as if he wouldn't mind defacing them himself.

"Well whoever her owner is, they owe me a new set of sheets."

"Is that what this is about?" Suga retrieves his wallet from his back pocket, ready to surrender whatever trivial amount Daichi needs to placate him.

"8oo thread count." Suga drops his wallet in horror. "Egyptian cotton."

"She's your cat, Tanaka." 

Tanaka whips around to look at Suga, a look of disbelief on his face. The kitten mimes the movement, turning her head to look at Suga. They really are one and the same.

"Wha-... Who was the one saying they looked at all those kitten articles?! Who brought her home?!"

"I'm pretty sure that was you."

"Who named her?!"

"You were the one who pulled up the baby name website!"

"That you didn't even use! Where the hell did you get Kettle from?!"

The argument deteriorates at a rapid pace, and Daichi has heard more than his fair share of it. He rises from his seat on the couch, eager to escape the madness.

"As long as someone replaces my sheets by tomorrow evening, I'll be content." Daichi smiles at the two, and doesn't miss the way their bodies shudder in fear.

"Yes Daichi!" His two roommates look more than a little unnerved, enough for Daichi to consider taking pity on them. But then he notices it's oddly silent.

"...Where's the kitten?"

Before either roommate can answer, the apartment fills with a raspy retching sound, coming directly from Daichi's room. By the time they reach his bed, all trying to squeeze through the doorway at once, it's too late. 

Kettle looks pleased with herself as she hops off the bed and makes her way towards Tanaka. She rubs her tiny head against his shins before sauntering out.

"...Maybe we should have named her Hinata."

**Author's Note:**

> Hinata probably sneezed right as he was about to spike a toss.


End file.
